In her upcoming book, What Happened, Hillary Clinton will do what basically everyone else has been doing since November 2016: relitigate the election. In one excerpt that’s already been made public, she laid some of the blame for her loss on her Democratic primary opponent Bernie Sanders,noting the impracticalities of his promises and claiming that his attacks on her helped pave the way for Donald Trump’s “Crooked Hillary” campaign. It’s an argument Clinton’s supporters have made as well, but at least one person is not completely sold: Seth Meyers, who dedicated a few minutes of Late Night to critiquing the analysis in a new “Hey!” segment.
“Hey! Hillary Clinton, don’t blame Bernie because Donald Trump called you names,” Meyers said Wednesday night. “I promise you he was going to do that anyway. It’s not like Trump watched Bernie at the debates and thought, ‘Criticizing Hillary? That just might work!’ And hey. You think Trump needed Bernie’s permission to be an asshole? Assholes don’t need permission. That’s what makes them assholes.”
Bernie, Meyers argued, is not the reason Clinton lost. “Do you know how I know that? You beat Trump by 3 million votes. If you want to blame something ancient, blame the Electoral College. We shouldn’t be running the most important elections on Earth on a system designed over 200 years ago to appease slave owners. If American Idol ran their voting like this, we’d all have a Sanjaya CD in our cars.”
Many Clinton supporters point to how long Sanders waited before throwing his support behind Clinton, arguing that had he done so sooner, she ultimately would have won more votes. The vast majority of Sanders supporters did vote for Clinton, but more than 10 percent actually voted for Trump instead, while a small percentage opted to vote third-party or to abstain from voting. Still, Meyers points out that Clinton is not without blame in her loss: “He didn’t tell you not to go to Wisconsin. He didn’t tell you to do paid speeches to Wall Street. And he didn’t write this terrible joke for you,” Meyers said, rolling a clip of Clinton stiltedly quipping, “I don’t know who created Pokémon Go, but I’m trying to figure out how we get them to have Pokémon Go to the Polls.”
“And hey. We are living through a very dark time in America,” Meyers added, “but there is also an unprecedented opportunity to bring Democrats and liberals together in a stand against the hate and incompetence in Washington. The best way to do this is to get the people who voted for you and the people who voted for Bernie on the same page. This isn’t the time to complain because Senator Woodstock didn’t roll over for you. Hey, if anything, he helped make you a better candidate—you know, the candidate who beat Donald Trump by 3 million votes.”